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8.08.2005

before i start my tirade i want to pass along this.
thanks to Glen's boyfriend for being, as Glen refers to him, "a thinker" and finding it.
i laughed my ass off.
it makes me a little ashamed of my own content.

so
i have always known that a cruise would not be a vacation for someone like me
someone who hates people.
someone who is disgusted by the primitiveness of humans
someone who hates bad food
and someone who really feels uncomfortable around most straight people

i was was pleasantly surprised to find that i not only was i right about people
but that it is so much worse than i thought.

this cruise line is supposed to be "GREAT!" and "FABULOUS!" and "SOPHISTICATED!"

it was ghetto

the people were mannerless sloths from the middle of the country who had obviously, from the way that they stampeded the "midnight-all-you-can-eat-bbq-buffet", never eaten before.
we were innocent bystanders having a nap on a lounge chair trying to escape our cabin and the ever escalating temper tantrums of my DARLING neice ("NOOOOOO I don't WANT/HAVE/NEED to!")
when all of a sudden
it was like a cattle run
every fatty on the ship was running towards the pool
not to get a bit of excercise in the salt water swimming pool
but to snag as much of the cheap grade "D" short ribs as they could get on the plates- which, by the way, were what we here in NY call SERVING PLATTERS.

i actually saw fights break out over 'line cutting'
of course the fighting was understandable for a few reasons:
A. These people had not eaten in at LEAST 3 hours
B. There was not enough food on those tables to feed Niger
C. They are fat pigs
D. They have ZERO manners or proper upbringing

any faith that i may have had in humans is now officially gone.

Liz and i came up with a bunch of theories about how we have the advantage in situations like this because we live in a city and we know how to live in such close proximity to other people and these people live in houses detached from other people and they drive cars blah blah blah

but the bottom line is you can raise minimum wage but class is taught
and these people are not educators.

I have seen the face of straight, suburban America
and we are fucking DOOMED

.: posted by landry 3:20 PM

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